eked out a skeletal arrangement of the final version of monica, wait. movies of dead people was absolutely not working under any circumstances. annihilated was once good and is now a mess with scattered fragmented bass tracks and no useable guitar track. recording has not yet begun on the remaining two tracks. my eyes and some of the muscles on my left arm burn, i can't stop sweating in this heat, and i feel like i'm going to vomit. tomorrow afternoon i'll catch up on some sleep and from here on out i will go on a near hunger/sleep strike forcing myself to keep going. i secretly almost want to die as a result of making this music.

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ughhh i have been dead tired for most of the week now, however things resume today... 'day 3' was recording annihilated's bass w/ ray... more assembling of that along with the other stuff happens today. i realise that doesn't make sense, but then again i'm THE WALKING DEAD.

current listening (cos i haven't done one of these in a while): lots of placebo, the selftitled 'under the influence of giants' record, queen's 'the show must go on', and i feel like there's something else but i also feel like i can't comprehend the names of bands and such. i'm pretty beat if you haven't noticed.

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spent a week transgressing and now i'm prepared to spend a week paying for it.
tomorrow night i finish some of the last few tracks of 'annihilated' (+ maybe some guitar tracks for some of the others) then it looks like we'll assemble it all on monday and take things from there. MODP and monica look next on the list... maybe i'll get lucky and those two will fall together just as easily... setting up the other two will be the tough part.

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since i'd been living the asshole life for a few days naturally now i'm beat and can't focus. i know it's my own damn fault but it's pissing me off. i still have the rest of tonight and all of tomorrow to cram, however. there's a newfound urgency in me.
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one last thing tonight i promise - i guess the tweaks i made to annihilated were pretty significant cos now it sounds really solid in the car - tim added a synth line to the bassy bit after the bridge... i tweaked it a little and got these sweet gothy chord things out of it but it sounds a wee bit out of place... also temporarily replaced what was one of the demo guitar/bass tracks from the same part with this sweet-ass pulse synth part... i might consider using that instead of real bass guitar for that segment. the intro tends to overstay it's welcome but it's really heavy now, and as for the stupid monica, wait testrun... i can at least say i sort of like the idea of using the synth patch i used tonight for the chorus. the rest of it can fuckin' fly. i'm actually kinda superpsyched to do some stuff for MODP next. i have this 'alec empire if he were dracula' thing in mind.

if i were to apply percentages representing how finished the final studio versions of each track are(is?) they would be the following:
however keep in mind they all have demos done already for them so it's not like i'm just like stumbling around in the dark or whatever.


after a day off to think up some things and ace some serious beers,
today got off to a shit start and took off into the toilet.
woke up later than i wanted to, took longer packing than i wanted to,
ended up running out the door with a styrofoam bowl of leftover pasta which i ate in the car,
and arrived at tim's around... 2:30? when i wanted to be there by noon?
couldn't focus and wound up going for food. best part being when i realised i didn't have my wallet with me. picked it up, ate, went back to work and ended up working on what's probably a useless, unsalvageable cover of 'old man'.

finally started dicking around for real and wound up with some rudimentary sequencing for 'monica, wait' (arguably the most difficult to write/arrange song i've made) and that's it so far.

there are still a few hours left in the day and if i don't turn things around i'll feel like a useless jackass. considering that's how i've felt for approx. all but one out of the past 10000000 days, whatever.
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(1) returners.com will now be updated much more regularly
(2) hence, the viewscreen has been updated
(3) and a new default picture is up on the myspace
(4) most importantly, the 1st mix of annihilated sounds AMAZING in the car, and it's only like 15-20% done. i was screaming and clapping (while driving). so cool. :]